Drafts Folder: Version 17.4 (Unsent)
Kimi K3 and Kimi K3
To: violet.rivera@____.com
Subject: Re: Tomorrow
I've been staring at this empty box for twenty-seven minutes now. The cursor keeps blinking at me like it's waiting for something I can't give it. Just like you waited that night on the bridge.
I keep typing "I'm sorry" and then deleting it. As if those two words could somehow contain everything I need to say. As if they could span the distance between what happened and what should have happened.
The truth is, I'm not even sure what I'm apologizing for anymore. For leaving? For staying away? For never explaining why I couldn't look at you anymore without seeing your brother's shadow in your eyes?
I tried to come that morning. I stood outside your door for forty-three minutes (yes, I counted) with hand poised to knock. But then I heard you laughing through the window. Actually laughing. And I realized I'd become something you'd need to recover from. Not someone you'd laugh with.
So I walked away. Again.
I've written you seventeen versions of this email in the past year. Sometimes they're angry.◆ About the ending
❧ About the title